When you look at my big belly, skinny legs and spindly arms you would find it hard to believe that all of that
beauty is accomplished by absolutely NO working out of any kind. About now you are asking yourself why I would
start off a race report with that little tid bit of information (yuk right?)…well it is to preface my total and utter lack of
physical preparation for this past weekends enduro in Marquette MI. Now Gus tries to make me feel better by telling
my that “round” is a shape but somehow as I was laying under my bike at the btm of a moon rock and in a mud-hole
I found no humor in that little Debbie Downer speech of his. Ah but enough about me and my Olympic physic…how
about some race recapping!
Given the sheer distance separating Gus and Marquette he opted out of participating in this event. That left the
P and the D of PG & D (Dean is a new official member of the team this year) to hold up the honor (or not hold it up
as it were) of the team. Having said that we were blessed to be sharing the call of the open road with none other
than Smooth Curty Shomburg and Da Pope both of Madison Motorcycle club fame. Man this was going to be a
good trip with two class acts participating, Dean and already figured we would have to be on our best behavior…or
not. A 9:30 am depart time from Casa De Speedy was planned. A last minute cancellation by Da Pope somehow
created a downer and less religious feel to the load up process, but we endured and decided to soldier on. On the
road at 9:35 put us in good position to get to the pit area before dark, that and the fact that it does not get dark in
the UP until like 11:00 pm also helped. The trip up was uneventful but fun as we had a full work out in the verbal
jousting department as Dean and I tried are best to accost Smooth C (I like that, maybe Curt could be the artist
formerly known as Smooth..now Smooth C like Smoothie but different). He just would not break and kept is
infectious smile showing and further cemented his place with us dummies…I knew I liked the guy for a reason! So
we almost get to the start and Smooth C decided he has to take a pee….we wing the rig into the small out skirts of
Rocking Remington, a small town just west of Marquette, a slight detour ensued as we toured thru this town netted
us absolutely no noticeable gain in any department other than it left us wondering what the town folk do during the
winter for fun other than watch it snow. 7:30pm finds us at the pits (so much for FNG Bruce’s 5.5 hr time line), we
set up camp and buzz up to get tech’d and signed up.
I must give props to the Sandstormers for setting up a first class program. From the tech inspection to the nice
big circus style tent used for signup. The people in signup knew there jobs and it showed, everyone was shuffled
thru in a very timely fashion. From there we were ushered over to a table staffed by Alan Randt, this was the point
in which you had to purchase/rent your transponder. Now here is a little math lesson for ya to enjoy. The
transponder could be rented for the weekend for twenty dollars, 15 of which would be refunded to you upon
returning the transponder at the end of race day. So that leads me to ask, that what if we keep it until after the
Duquette National, Can we turn it in then and get our 15 dollars back? We were told that if we did that we would not
get our refund back. So to recap if I rent it today and give it back I get 15 dollars back…netting me a total
investment of 5 dollars for Marquette and when I rent it at Duquette and do the same thing I will have 5 dollars
there. Grand total of $10.00. However if I choose to keep the transponder I will have $20.00 invested, exactly
doubling my investment. Let me ponder this for a moment….nope I will bring it back each time. WTF? It is only a
$10 diff but it is the principle of it………….. Not pre-registering and wanting to ride together found us signed
up on row 42....oh well the trail should be good and broke in by that time!
Alrighty….RACE TIME! We get geared up and head to the start. We held our breath in anticipation, but after Dean
passed out from holding his too long we decided to just go to the start (I made that part up but only because it
made me chuckle at the thought of if that was physically possible). Before we left we were instructed to figure out
the “pecking order” with regards to the order that we rode in due to having to pass thru the transponders in single
file. For some dam reason DeanO Bravo and Smooth C elected me to go first?! Off we go. The trail was awesome
to start, mega traction, big berms that were firm. I mean like jam into them full on and just lay the bike over and just
pin it! Fun stuff for sure and it reminded me why I ride a motorcycle! After a short fast couple of miles we were
dumped into a hillside, I am sure the fist 25 minutes were good to get thru but for us way back on 42 the 190 bikes
before us really tore the trail and left it rutted and muddy. There were bikes stuck in various spots, some good
spots and some bad. At about mile 4 or so I approach a hill and find two riders stuck on it and just standing there
talking to one another. I wait for a minute (well maybe like 5 seconds really) and yell “come-ONNNNNNN!” The look
back, slide there bike aside and let me hit the hill, I blast up the hill and as I pass them both one of them yells to me
“A_ _ Hole!”. I stop and yell back to him to settle down that I just wanted to get thru, no worries though it was just a
guy from Ill that rides like a spode when milaging enduros (Gus you know who I am talking about). I check out the
section with a 9 after getting stuck 3 times and waiting for riders to clear the trail. Dean gets a 11 and has about the
same sentiment as I about the section.
The next 4 sections find me going 5,13,8,5 to Deans 7,15,11,8….right about where he and I seem to be with
regards to separation in times. While our scores were poor thru these sections and we were both way more tired
than we should be the trail was just awesome and flowed well with a few small moon rocks mixed in for fun. We were
having fun and kept commenting on how the Sandstormers held true to there promise to make this event
fun…mission accomplished! Now the last section of the day proved to be the thorn in our chubby little sides. Only
the Pros and the A riders had to ride this section ensuring it would be challenging. Boy was it ever, it was one moon
rock after another. For those of you that are not familiar with these rocks they are roughly three times the size of
the lower 48 states, bold faces, deep crevices and some mud and trees thrown in just for fun. Now I have no doubt
these are a blast to ride when you are full of energy and play riding, but at the level or lack there of focus and
energy I had at this point, resulted in the section being long and hard. It was only 11 miles long and I dropped 21
points in it and Dean dropped 24. That compared to Lafferty who dropped only 6 minutes….yikes I won’t wait up
and expect a call from the Red Bull KTM team anytime soon! Lucky the B& C riders did not have to ride this as I
think it would have killed them.
So to end the day I dropped a 61, Dean dropped a 76 Smooth C dropped 74. I believe that I finished 314th
place in 250A, Dean got like 312th in Sen A and Smooth C got around 7th place (for real) in his class. Not the
results we were looking for but we could not comment enough on how fun the trail was. My hat and socks too are off
to the Sandstormers for putting on an most excellent event. The trail was great, the program was ran smooth, they
had nice trophies and the turnout was great. I believe that once word gets out that this event has turned around
with regards to the trail, the rider support will explode. Jack Drummond headed the event up and should be
commended for his and his groups efforts! I will definitely be going back next year!
These are the actual transponders we had to wear.
Random thoughts:
1) Deans GPS lady (the one that tells you the directions) does not sound nearly as hot as the one on my old
Magellan Roadmate. Though his gives directions that get you there and mine went back to the manufacture.
2) Da Pope owes us gas money even though he did not go as we were so bummed to not have him along. Your
portion Pope is $3500.00.
3) Ben Eggum is quickly approaching Duey’s technique and speed in destroying the look of his motorcycles.
Seriously Benny…..what are you doing to that thing to make it look so shitty?
4) The UP is gorgeous this time of year…for real!
5) It sucks not having Gus along.
6) It was awesome having Smooth C along.
7) Dean still looks like a goon with his riding glasses, but he still hauls butt!
8) Brian “Swap” Terry does not know how to put grips on his motorcycle and the result is a stuck throttle and a huge
crash. Further cementing his nickname. Glad you are OK Mister!
9) I miss the rest of the Madison crew going to the races.
10) It is good to be back racing again after a dismal spring. Good results or bad I still luv riding.
So with my Coors Light in my hand, I stand on the podium of life! Now that I think about it, the whole “round is a
shape” thing does resonate some truth. As I was crashing on the moon rocks I thought to myself, if it were not for
my pudgy exterior I would have possibly broken a bone. So thanks to my sponsor: Little Debbie cup cakes for
keeping me safe.
Till next week (the Hayward Blue Hills enduro is next week), heres dirt in your eye!
Speedy Pete
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